36. Foreign to familiar

La cosa mas important con este libro es que tengo que reconocer que voy a trabajar con personas que tienen un estilo muy diferente que lo mio.  No debo cambiar, pero también no debo esperar que ellos van a cambiar.  Solo debemos respectar las diferencias y sigue trabajando juntos, intentando a amplificar los partes buenos de nuestros estilos y disminuir los partes difícil.

Ellos van a ser muy diferente y van a comportarse muy diferente, y no debo volverme enojado por los diferencias inevitable.

Los puntos claves:

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The most important thing with this book is that I have to admit that I work with people who have a very different style than mine. I must not change, but I should not expect that they will change. We just have to respect the differences and continue working together, trying to amplify the good parts of our styles and lower parts difficult.

They will be very different, will behave very differently, and I must not become angry about the inevitable differences.

The key points:


Cultures of the world are largely divided in two: "hot climate vs cold climate."  Hot climates are based on relationships, cold climate is task oriented.  All hot climate communication has the goal of promoting a feel good friendly atmosphere.  The job is delayed at times to attend to the relationship.  Truth is less important than the relationship. It is disrespectful to get to the point without exchanging pleasantries first.  Cold climates answer factually and objectively irrespective of the feel good mood. They will neglect feelings to get the job done.  Efficiency and time hold sway, it is good to respect other peoples time by not wasting it.
Hots will respond to direct questions in anyway that makes the mood friendly, even if bit constrains inaccurate info or is yes when really they want to say no.  Ways around this that are perfectly acceptable: asking indirect questions, having a third party ask for you.
Colds value time and efficiency. Get to the point.  The truth hurts sometimes.  Etc.
Hots are taught that they belong gonna family, a culture, a community. Your actions reflect on the whole group.  You speak for the whole group.  You must share food, resources, opinions, homes, etc.  You serve the whole.
Colds are taught they they are individuals, independent.  They must take care of themselves.  No one will help them.  You represent yourself and no one else.
In countries where there has been wealth for generations the orientation is for comfort and convenience.  Most counties the orientation is towards justice and survival. The flavor of food is meaningless compared to it calorie count.  Feasts indicate generosity, and important cultural practice.  You have to try everything because not doing so is forsaking generosity.
In group cultures leaders tell everyone what to do, and they follow commands.  Colds allow for innovation and initiative from all group members. Hots are raised to suffer for the sake of the group.  Colds are taught to let their opinions be known truthfully.
Hots value inclusion.  If it is in your presence you are invited.  Privacy seems exclusive and is not valued highly.  Food is huge: you alllllllways share what you have.  Its less about food and more about sharing what you have.  Those who have less still share.  But everything is shared so no one notices the haves and have nots.
Hospitality always have involves food or drink.  For hots this has to be in the home: it is an offer to relate to them personally, to forge a relationship through which they can do business.  Restaurants are not personal enough.  Casually, they will never forfeit hospitality for time alone.
Hots provide everything for visitors and guests, colds expect them to take care of themselves.  Remember this when entertaining a guest from a hot country.
Cultures are often high or low context.  If they have developed for a long time in relative cultural isolation they are high context.  This means that traditions exist and matter.  Low context is a constant mind boif non dominant cultures leading to a culture with no serious cultural rules.  When entering a high context society you need to realize that you carry no weight and who you know really matters.  If thou are introduced or associated with the right people you will be accepted by association.  Clothing matters.  It shows you respect their culture. It shows you take their context seriously.  Informality (not using a title when addressing someone) is disrespectful.   In high context countries greeting are important.  Take the time to show respect, sincerity, and attention, even if you don't know proper protocol.